I am alone.
I am utterly alone.
By the time you read this note I will be gone, having jumped having plummeted off the Winter River Bridge.
*ahem* Excuse me, I just couldn’t resist the urge to quote something melodramatic. Yeah, I’m home alone – for the longest time in a long time. Ten days to be precise. It doesn’t sound like much, does it? Neither did it to me, but it seems to stretch out, something in the manner of that arrow that infinitely halves its distance to the barn door and will never hit it.
My folks are over in WA spending time with the Aussie branch of the family, as Dad’s brother has developed cancer. And… I’m not sure what else to say about that right now. I’m so glad they’re able to spend some time with him… and they finally get to see west Australia. Who would’ve known what kind of circumstances would end up leading them there?
It is cold, it is windy, and it is pishing down with rain. *perks up her ears* Well, at this moment the rain has stopped persisting, but it’ll be back. The wind delighted in keeping me and the cats awake, strewing a large twiggy piece of dead tree across the driveway, eviscerating my rainbow brolly many times over, whipping my hair and clothes around and conspiring with the rain to give me a thorough soaking, including after I got under the bus shelter. I’ve said this before and I’ll say this again: I love my new electric blanket. As do Roux, Samwise and Jinny.
I’d like to think that I’d enjoy occasional solitude, but I’m not very good at it. At not having someone else to nucleate around, even in an oblique manner. I haven’t got a lot done lately, in general, and now the folks have gone away I’m getting even less done. I feel like the little bit of warmth in a hibernating body that tucks itself inside away from the extremities to conserve itself. (How easily analogies to do with weather and temperature spill from me today…) I find myself making a vague sort of nest in the warmest part of the house – which is not my room – and mostly vegging out. I’ve arrayed around me my jewellery-mongery supplies and I’m playing a string of movies which to me are pleasant and well-known – whereas the cable channels offer no comfort. I’ll tell you something, though – as lovely as it is to be popular by default with the cats, one person is not enough for the three of them. They’ve been nucleating around me in turn, with some rare moments of peace, and a healthy amount of jealous jostling and fighty-biteying and puffed-up tails. And they keep trying to sit on my lap while I’m making jewellery!!! o_O
The dryer won’t work because its door is broken. Bloody Murphy works overtime, in all weathers. I’ll be going to Upper Hutt tomorrow night to rent some TV shows on DVD on half-price Tuesday. Yay! My curiosity has been perked with Babylon 5, and I’m dying to see Quantum Leap again, even if they’ve butchered the soundtrack. I might also partake of some season three Sex And The City… next week, depending on my budget.
Oooh, this laptop is nice and warm. I shall hold my hands by it to warm them not unlike before a brazier.
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